The Replacements

"Toto, we aren't in Kansas anymore"

Ya, I know. It's not glamorous.

I had to borrow a lineman's pads and helmet. An injured safety's jersey. And the coaches wrist playbook. My linemen (#67 and #74) don't speak ANY English. The field is 60yds long. There are only 8 players on each side of the ball. My best receiver is deaf. Most of the referees have never actually been to a real American football game. Most of the players wear their kipas (yarmulkes) underneath their helmet. And games are never played between Friday sunset and Saturday sunset (due to the Sabbath). But you know what? It was some of the most fun I've ever had playing football.

I had heard that Israel was trying to get an American Football League off the ground, but I didn't think too much of it leading up to our move overseas. Then when we were doing our embassy check-in here, one of the folks in the shipping office asked if I wanted to play for his local team. "I heard you've played some quarterback before. Our record isn't very good, but we have the best offensive line in the league. We just need a quarterback. We've already played 7 of our 10 games this year, but today is the last day we can register new players. Would you like to come play for an underdog?" My brain is still upside down from jetlag and the onslaught that is the Hebrew language. We have no car, no household goods, and I hadn't even gotten internet or a cell phone setup yet. "Oh, what the hell. Why not coach? When's our first game?" "This weekend", he replied... It sounded like a perfect "Olmsted Experience". Right on the edge of your comfort zone, and completely in a foreign language/culture.

We lost both of our last two games, but at least, neither of our opposing teams had any idea what hit them. They had never seen an American style dropback passing quarterback before, but then again our receivers had never caught from one either. I didn't care, it's not about the winning. My wife on the other hand (who is as big or more of a football fan than me), nearly ran on the field to yell at my receivers for dropping so many passes. (She reminded me of an adult version of the coaches daughter in Remember the Titans).

Welp. I've agreed to coach (and play) for them next year, as long as I get to design and implement a real West Coast Offense. While it's illegal here, there are rumors that other teams will try to bribe "the American quarterback" to come play for them. I already love this team. It feels exactly like the movie Replacements and I wouldn't have it any other way. And at the end of the day, what better way to improve your language and immersion, than doing something you love, with good people around you.

Here's a couple quick clips from our last two games.
Petah Tikva Troopers (us in Green) against the Haifa Underdogs (in Haifa)

Petah Tikva Troppers against the Jerusalem Lions (in Jerusalem)

Off-duty IDF Soldier on the sidelines with his team for the game

"How are we doing?"

Since we got the news that we would be studying in Tel Aviv, we had heard nothing but the most rave reviews about Tel Aviv. About it's modernity, cleanliness, overall European/Miami-esque feel, etc. To be blunt, this is not the impression we've had thus far, but we're beginning to understand and appreciate it for what it is. As much as it wants to be otherwise, Israel is a Middle Eastern country dressed in Western clothing. When compared to any country within a thousand miles, Israel is downright America. When compared to Western Europe, it is still very much the middle east.

And herein lies one of Israel's major social and cultural paradoxes:
"A local journalist, Ammon Dankner, wrote of an alternate world where 'Shimon Peres’s innovative technological project causes Israel to detach from the Middle East and sail westward through the Mediterranean Sea, like a sort of floating island. Laughter aside, Dankner nailed the spirit of the time. In recent years Israel has been feeling, thinking and behaving as though it is no longer located in West Asia and can exist as an island that has broken off from it. As if there was no Arab world, no Palestine, no Iran. No Arabs, no settlers, no occupation....Rockets arrive from Gaza in the morning and venture capital [$475M from Accel Partners both on the day President Obama arrived] from London in the afternoon. Israel’s ability to live as if it were disconnected from the rest of the region is impressive and necessary. It’s also illusory and dangerous." - Full Article by Thomas Friedman - March 23, 2013 - https://www.nytimes.com/2013/03/24/opinion/sunday/friedman-israel-bits-bytes-and-bombs.html?_r=0 

Without fail, nearly every time we meet new friends, their first question is "How do you like Israel so far?" But their question is really one of validation: "How are we doing?". America is the only country in the world that Israel looks up to (and the only one who can truly prod them to do anything they don't want to). In many ways, America is a young country (237 years old), but when you look at Israel (at 65 years), they're downright puppies. And sometimes they act like it. It's not a condemnation, rather an often over-looked observation. And when you realize just how young their country is, I think it provides perspective and context not just to their international behavior but also to their need for US approval and validation.